To Rob and Allison – The Day After (Your Wedding Day)

The Day. The wedding day.

allison ring

Two people who have expressed their love to each other in words, song, gifts, looks and touches will now seal their love in the highest form possible – marriage.

Rob and Allison will be become one.

As we look forward to your wedding day this Saturday, (and finally meeting you, Rob) we want to share some things that will be paramount for you to consider as you embark on this life journey together. As one. After your wedding day.

(extracted from John Piper’s book – This Momentary Marriage)


Marriage is God’s doing.

  • God gave away the first bride. (GEN 2:22)
  • God spoke the design of marriage into existence. (GEN 2:24)
  • God performs the one-flesh union. (GEN 2:24)

Marriage is for God’s glory.

  • Staying married, therefore, is not mainly about staying in love. It is about keeping covenant. Christ will never leave His wife. (EPH 5:31-32) Christ keeps His covenant forever.

The covenant union between a husband and wife is designed by God to reflect and display the spiritual union between Christ and the church.

As the Lord “bears with you”, so you should bear with your spouse.

Christ always forgives more and endures more than we do.

God gets glory when two very different and very imperfect people forge a life of faithfulness in the furnace of affliction by relying on Christ.

When we forgive, we do not exact a payment. We treat people better than they deserve.

Grace makes you want to change for the glory of Christ and for the joy of your spouse. And grace is the power to do it.

Keeping first things first makes second things better. Staying in love isn’t the first task.

The one-flesh union between man and wife means that in a sense they are now one body so that the care a husband has for his wife he, in that very act, has for himself.

Husbands and wives who are filled with the Holy Spirit serve one another. They humble themselves and get down low to lift one another up.

The roles of husband and wife are rooted in the distinctive roles of Christ and His church.


Headship is not a right to control or to abuse or the neglect. It’s the responsibility to love like Christ in leading and protecting and providing for our wives and families.

Leadership is not mainly a right and privilege, but a burden and a responsibility.

Headship involves the kind of leadership that a woman can affirm and honor.

  • Physical provision
  • Spiritual provision
  • Physical protection
  • Spiritual protection

Fathers have a leading responsibility in raising children.


The presence of hope in the invincible sovereignty of God drives out fear.

The keys of submission —

  • Hope
  • Fearlessness
  • Inner tranquility

The wife is summoned to develop depth and strength and character not from her husband but for her husband.


Sin is what you feel and think and do when you are not taking God at His word and resting in His promises.

Marriage is not absolutely for making children; but it is absolutely for making children followers of Jesus one way or another, directly or indirectly.

The chief task of parenting is to know God for who He is in His many attributes – especially as He has revealed Himself in the person of Jesus and His cross – and then live in such a way with our children that we help them see and know this multi-faceted God.

The husband and wife are a drama of the covenant-keeping love between Christ and the church. God’s design is that children grow up watching Christ love the church and watching the church delight in following Christ. His design is that the beauty and strength and wisdom of this covenant relationship be absorbed by the children from the time they are born.

God has never done anything that should legitimately cause anger in any of His children. We are never warranted in getting angry at God. EVER.

Overcome your anger and replace it with tender-hearted joy.  EPH 4:31-32

What our children need from us is that we experience the fullness of God’s offer of healing.

The beauty of the covenant-keeping love between Christ and His church shines brightest when nothing but Christ can sustain it.

rob and allison


Rob and Allison – May God be exalted in your lives. You will have many challenges in this world. And in a hurry. Do not let those things steal away your affections for God or one another. He is faithful. It is our privilege to share in your joy.

love, Uncle Jim and Aunt T


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